Sunglass Enthusiasts

As some of you may or may not know, this past summer I worked at a Sunglass Hut.  It was an amazing experience and I truly enjoyed selling designer merchandise.  While I used to judge people by their shoes, I now find my attention wandering to their sunglasses.

But there are two things that cause me a great deal of confusion.

1. Ray Bans.  Will someone please explain to me why everybody loves them so much.

They’re everywhere! Whether I’m walking down the street, or watching TV, I’m bombarded with people wearing Ray Bans of all different types – wayfarers, aviators, clubmasters, and sporty ones.  When will the madness stop?  Ray Bans are not attractive.  They’re as plain as plain can be, and when has plain ever been enticing or attractive?

Now before I continue on this rant of mine I just want to acknowledge that I do realize a lot of people wear Ray Bans, including people I know and love.  So please don’t be offended by my negative allegations against Ray Bans.  Well, actually…you can be offended if you’d like…but it’s not a personal attack, just so you know. I’m simply questioning your judgement, that’s all.

Although I have a natural inclination to hate Ray Bans I don’t want to diss them completely because I did sell a ton of them this summer, so it’s hard to be down on something that gave me a fat pay-check. But personally I find them boring, ugly, unreliable, and devoid of any style!

Every single pair within the different categories of Ray Bans are practically identical.  What ever happened to individuality?  Every Ray Ban Wayfarer looks the same, with only slight colour or size variations.  How does it make you feel to know that millions of other people are wearing the exact same pair of sunglasses as you.

Nowadays trends are constantly changing, so why is that Ray Bans can get away with being practically the same year after year?  However, I am fully aware that some top notch designers have gotten famous off their classic designs that remain relatively the same, such as the Chanel bag.  But exceptions can be made.  Chanel’s classic quilted purse with the chain leather straps and the signature logo have style, elegance, and poise.  Chanel bags also signify that you have money…enough money to spend over 3 grand on a purse.  Ray Bans on the other hand, while they’re not Target cheap, they’re certainly no Chanel bag.  So if it’s not a class status that people are aiming for when they wear Ray Bans, then what is their reasoning behind this unfashionable fashion choice?

Also, what is up with Ray Bans’ orange, green, or red framed foldable wayfarers that look like the dollar store kids glasses?  Who would pay approximately $200 dollars for them?  They look like plastic toy sunglasses you can purchase at a dollar store.  If this is considered stylish…I want to be very, very unstylish.

Now comes the part that may really confuse you…

I bought a pair of Ray Bans.  Now before people start calling me a hypocrite, or worse…a fad follower…I’d like to explain myself.

Have you ever walked into an ugly store and found something you liked?  Just because 99% of a store’s merchandise is gross, it doesn’t mean it can’t get lucky that one percent of a time and sell something that is not completely repulsive.  And likewise, just because a store gets lucky and puts out one decent product it doesn’t erase the general pitifulness of the brand.  It’s like that average-looking, mediocre person you know…there’s always that one percent of the time when he/she lands a really hot chick/stud and everyone is stunned.  But it doesn’t mean he’s the next Brad Pitt/Megan Fox.

Well I experienced a similar situation.  I found myself falling for a pair of Ray Ban aviators even though I hate 99% of them.  The pair I bought are unlike the typical aviators that have a boring brown, green, blue, or reflective lens.  The aviators I got are a blue/green gradient lens and there was something just so uncanny about them.  Aviators in general, can be very attractive.  Ray Bans, however, manage to make them mediocre by giving them little to no detail.  The pair I bought however, had an unusual lens that made them stand out from the others.  Although I was extremely hesitant to buy them because of my dislike for Ray Bans in general, the unique lens combined with the fact that I got an employee discount persuaded me to give in and buy them despite my reservations towards the brand.

And the result:

I hate them.  They’re so uncomfortable.  First of all they feel like they’re going to fall off my face all the time because the arms are so light and the lenses are so heavy.  While I could fidget with the arms a bit to make them fit better, I shouldn’t have to…I’ve never had to adjust a pair of sunglasses that I’ve bought before, so why should I have to start now.  And second of all, the lenses aren’t big enough! They let light in from the top.  It’s the most annoying thing ever to have light blinding you from the top of your vision.  Because the frame is not tall enough, I also get the unpleasant joy of seeing the top rim of my glasses in part of my vision as I’m wearing them.  It’s so distracting.

So for the love of sunglasses, will people please try on their Ray Bans just one more time and look at yourself in the mirror.  Although it’s sometimes hard to disseminate media influences from your own opinion, ask yourself whether you actually like the design of the sunglasses and whether they are flattering to your face, or whether you somehow got sucked into the Ray Ban bandwagon.  But take comfort in knowing that you are not alone.  Millions of people have got sucked into the same awful hayride.

2. Now moving attention away from Ray Bans, there is another habit that confuses me quite a bit.

While working in a mall at the Sunglass Hut, I saw that many people wear sunglasses indoors.  I’m confused…aren’t sunglasses meant for the sun?  Is there a sun in the mall that I just don’t know about?  Personally, wearing sunglasses indoors where it’s not sunny gives me a headache.  So why do people do it?  And it wasn’t just a few people.  Probably 40-50% of the people walking by the store were wearing sunglasses.

If anyone has an answer to any of my confusions please feel free to comment.  I’m willing and open to any ideas or suggestions that people have, but I can’t guarantee that I will see eye-to-eye with you.

I love sunglasses, and I treasure my Chanel and Gucci sunglasses dearly, but I would not wear them indoors…even if they looked great with my outfit.  I have my standards. Sunglasses are for outdoors.  Ray Bans are for collecting dust in the closet.  And that is just simply that.

Feel free to disagree.

Forever and always.

Love,

J. Molly

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